hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
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