week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
