direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize