I want to stick my p in your. b.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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