I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
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