Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize