Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
