He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
