If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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