wakey wakey hands off snakey
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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