I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Randomize
