Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
How many fucks given?
0.12846
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
