Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
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