That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I checked into jail on foursquare
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
i would one night stand the shit outta him
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
