don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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