I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
