She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Randomize
