there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
