Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(504): View more from Louisiana

i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.

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(504): i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person. http://tfl.nu/uzlk

Replies (9) Good night (2275) Bad night (1001)
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(713): View more from Texas

I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...

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(713): I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way... http://tfl.nu/0604

Replies (12) Good night (749) Bad night (1410)
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(803): View more from South Carolina

you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?

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(803): you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money? http://tfl.nu/t6x6

Replies (18) Good night (5825) Bad night (670)
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(626): View more from California

You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.

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(626): You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I. http://tfl.nu/6sde

Replies (9) Good night (6932) Bad night (825)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.

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(615): His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary. http://tfl.nu/s0bc

Replies (15) Good night (782) Bad night (5024)
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(650): View more from California

You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.

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(650): You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him. http://tfl.nu/2plm

Replies (14) Good night (5614) Bad night (1092)
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(404): View more from Georgia

So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?

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(404): So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat? http://tfl.nu/7wij

Replies (12) Good night (5704) Bad night (1084)
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(914): View more from New York

Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it

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(914): Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it http://tfl.nu/0jmm

Replies (27) Good night (2275) Bad night (4870)
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(309): View more from Illinois

Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..

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(309): Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around.. http://tfl.nu/cqm4

Replies (4) Good night (2535) Bad night (960)
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(207): View more from Maine

how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.

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(207): how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me. http://tfl.nu/s06p

Replies (16) Good night (3688) Bad night (2002)
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(859): View more from Kentucky

how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?

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(859): how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong? http://tfl.nu/c3b4

Replies (6) Good night (913) Bad night (2751)
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(712): View more from Iowa

Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.

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(712): Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader. http://tfl.nu/60hc

Replies (1) Good night (1505) Bad night (416)
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(914): View more from New York

Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.

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(914): Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table. http://tfl.nu/r09f

Replies (9) Good night (439) Bad night (1028)
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(816): View more from Missouri

I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.

(1-816): View more from Missouri

I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.

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(816): I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week. (1-816): I think we all know your liver needs a man's name. http://tfl.nu/bufv

Replies (7) Good night (994) Bad night (299)
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(817): View more from Texas

I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"

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(817): I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here" http://tfl.nu/ku7n

Replies (2) Good night (354) Bad night (336)

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