I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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