Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
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