We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Just invented taco cereal.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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