the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize