dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize