So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
