Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Is it because I queefed?
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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