did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
