This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
