Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You pole danced in your parka.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
