just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
i was born a porn star she said
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
