Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
