we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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