I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize