i don't like sucking hair
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
NoShamevember. You game?
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
