the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
