Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
