Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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