you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
