I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
this is an emotional support booty call
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
