you guys were way drunker than both of me
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
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Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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