we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
you never un-have a 4some
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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