OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
