yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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