Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Randomize
