Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
