I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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