anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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