Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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