remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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