take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize