you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
