It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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