Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
